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Living Faith

Difficult People
Posted On: 2/29/2008  Posted By: CClabaugh
by: Debbie  Simler-Goff

 
For this inaugural BlOG I’d hoped to write something tremendously profound and inspiring. You know, really wow everyone with some deep spiritual insight. But, I promised God (and myself) that my BLOG entries would be honest and transparent. Honest in that I’ll never pretend to have handled my spiritual journey perfectly or to have all the answers. Transparent in that I’ll be open and reveal my heart (good or bad) and hope you’ll do the same. I’m on a journey to grow closer to God, to improve my Christian walk, and to become more like Jesus. Will you join me?

My topic for this entry is Difficult People. We encounter them at work, at the mall and sometimes even at home. Difficult People – DP’s for short - are usually unreasonable, selfish, rude, manipulative and stubborn. So why does God let them get away with it? He could zap them off the face of the earth if He chose to. But He doesn’t. He loves them too much to do that. And, He wants us to love them too. Luke 6:35 in the Living Bible says

"Love your enemies! Do good to them! Lend to them! And don't be concerned about the fact that they won't repay. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as sons of God: for he is kind to the unthankful and to those who are very wicked.”

Okay, I can love them – from afar. But do good to them?! Loan them money?! Extend myself to the person whose making my life miserable? It’s hard to do, but necessary if I truly want to be like Jesus. So how does doing good translate in a practical way? For example, I am a manager at work and there is an employee who is a DP with a capital D! He’s complained about me, fabricated a dozen untruths, and is confrontational. I do my best to respond to him with Christian kindness. But, according to Jesus I need to do much more. Now here’s where you can help me on my Christian journey: What good things should I do for this man? What about you? Do you have any DP’s in your life? Walk this journey with us for awhile and share your comments. We’ll grow strong together.

 

 

 

 

Comments/Replies: - [SUBMIT]

1: Who hasn't struggled with a "DP"! I've probably even been someone else's DP at times without realizing it, although I would not intentionally make someone's life miserable. Sometimes people are just opposite personalities and view things from a different perspective. Perhaps the answer to your question on how to handle a DP is found in Romans 12:17-21. I read it in the New Living Bible. It says in part: ""Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do your part to live in peace with everyone, as much as possible ... Never avenge yourselves. Leave that to God." This tells me that it is never wise to retaliate. If we do, we put ourselves on the same level as that person. It also lets me know that others will not be completely fooled by that person's actions. If we act correctly, others "can see that you are honorable." This passage goes on to tell us to feed them when they are hungry, give them something to drink when they are thirsty, and "they will be ashamed of what they have done to you." This is the old "kill them with kindness" technique. Is this easy? No. But it does let us sleep better at night, knowing we are doing our best to respond in a way that is pleasing to God. We also need to remember that God often uses difficulties as part of His refining process in our lives. Just think, your DP may help you grow in your walk with God. You will pray more. That's a thought!
Posted on: 3/4/2008 9:25:50 AM    Posted by: RPainter


 

2: Hi! Debbie, you have my sympathy. Who knows what motivates some people. It is hard to comprehend that God loves our enemies as much as He does us. I really wish He didn't. I want to be His favorite. But He apparently has lots of favorites. About the man you mentioned, perhaps you will have an opportunity to compliment or recognize something positive, intelligent, or useful he has done in front of others? This avoids your having to speak directly to him if you are not sure how he will react. Also if he is badmouthing you, this lessons his credibilty to others. It becomes apparent that you don't harbor ill-feelings and giving credit instead of trying to take credit is definitely a Christian thing to do. I will pray that God says "Peace be still" in your difficult situation.
Posted on: 3/4/2008 11:53:35 AM    Posted by: BPeacock


 

3: This is great! I love the More To Life blog. It is beautiful! Keep up the good work! I will visit often!
Posted on: 3/5/2008 1:01:53 AM    Posted by: GBaughman


 

4: Thanks so much for making this available to us. It is a blessing and I am telling my friends about it. blessings, Donna
Posted on: 3/6/2008 8:30:49 AM    Posted by: DCrain


 

5: I couldn't agree more with you Ruth! Following Biblical advice is sometimes challenging but alwasy worth it in the end. Thanks for sharing!
Posted on: 3/10/2008 8:38:55 PM    Posted by: DSIMLER-GOFF


 

6: Debbie, A couple of people in our little prayer group were having "DP" problems tonight, so we spent quite a while discussing your blog and various scriptures relating to how we should treat difficult people. By faith, applying these biblical principles will help bring more peace to each situation (one family and one work). We followed our discussion with prayer--which is always a good combination. Thanks for such a timely topic.
Posted on: 3/11/2008 9:47:54 PM    Posted by: RPainter